


Ninoneko Holmes and the Doomed Dinner Party

by darkdropout



Series: Ninoneko Holmes [6]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: M/M, Mikeneko Holmes no Suiri - Freeform, cat!Nino
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2014-11-27
Packaged: 2018-02-27 05:28:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2680781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkdropout/pseuds/darkdropout
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jun has a dinner party. Aiba assumes that cats are included guests.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of old, but I just realized it was never added to the series on ao3. Hope you enjoy!

“We’re here!” Aiba announces jovially when Jun opens the door.

Jun looks down at Aiba’s side bag incredulously, eyebrows drawing together in consternation at the cat glaring up at him from within it. “You brought your cat to my dinner party?”

Aiba frowns in confusion. “Eh? Of course! You invited us!”

“I invited you to dinner at my house,” Jun clarifies. “What part of that means bring your cat?”

“Matsujun!” Aiba gasps. “It’s not like I can leave Nino home alone all night! He’d get lonely!”

“He’s a cat. Cats are solitary creatures,” says Jun.

“Is that true?” Aiba looks down at Nino for confirmation. “Nino, is that true?”

Nino lets out an affronted meow from inside his bag.

“See!” Aiba says to Jun as if that settles the argument.

“Come in already,” Jun sighs, stepping back to give Aiba room to take off his shoes. “Everyone’s in the living room. There’s a cat bed and some toys in the closet. If he tears apart the feather one, you’ll be the one cleaning it up. The cat palace isn’t put together yet, but you can get Sho to help you.”

Aiba nods along, seemly unsurprised that Jun has been hording a house full of cat supplies all this time, but only because it’s not really a surprise at all - after all, Aiba has seen the collection of cat pictures on Jun’s phone.

While Jun continues to mutter to himself about catnip and litter box arrangements, Aiba takes Nino’s bag off his shoulder and opens it up to let the cat out. As soon as the zipper is back far enough for him to escape, Nino leaps forward, landing gracefully on the genkan ledge. His black fur is sticking up at odd angles and he looks a little disoriented, eying his surroundings with some suspicious. Aiba feels kind of bad - it was a bit of a harrowing trip to get here on a bumpy, crowded train. Aiba wonders if cats can get motion sickness - he’ll have to ask Nino later.

Jun is still talking away anxiously to himself like a slightly deranged party planner with a wedding full of crashers. “I don’t know what I’m going to feed him. Does he like Kobe beef?” he asks Aiba severely.

Aiba looks up from where he is gently prying Nino’s claws out of one of Jun’s luxurious-looking guest slippers - Nino’s curiosity is a bit tactile, even for a cat. But luckily Jun doesn’t seem to notice the damage being done to his property, too agitated by the possibility of last minute menu changes.

“No,” Aiba replies, ignoring the way Nino is now gnawing painfully on his fingers instead of the slipper. “Expensive food hurts his tummy. Do you have any of those scented tissue packs? He loves those!”

Jun’s expression is stoically derisive. “I’ll see what I can do.”


	2. Part 2

“Nino?” Ohno’s voice drifts in from the living room.

Nino’s ears twitch up in alarm. He releases Aiba’s finger and lets out an unsure little mew.

Aiba grins. “I didn’t tell him Oh-chan was coming,” he stage whispers to Jun.

Jun is unamused.

“Nino,” Ohno calls again.

The kitten meows.

“Ohno been asking if you were here yet since he walked in the door,” Jun tells Aiba, and to his credit it is with only the tiniest trace of resentment.

Nino is already padding cautiously down the hallway, his call and response with Ohno getting louder and louder with every step. When he gets to the living room, Ohno is waiting cross-legged on the floor.

“Hi!” he says as Nino jumps into his lap. Nino says hi too – by clawing his way up the front of Ohno’s shirt to lick the tip of Ohno’s nose with his little sandpaper tongue.

Ohno giggles. He brings his knees up to his chest and perches Nino on top of them so they’re face to face. Nino purrs. He licks the tip of Ohno’s nose again, then the side of his nose, then his cheek, and soon he's washing Ohno’s face in earnest.

“Oh-chan, is it your bath time?” asks Aiba as he enters the room behind Jun. “I had mine this morning.”

Ohno nods, one eye squinched shut in a wince as Nino continues to lap at him vigorously.

“Disgusting,” Jun balks, phone in hand.

The sound of a camera shutter is drowned out by a crash from the kitchen.

“Ah, Matsumoto-kun!” Sho wails from the same direction.

The expression on Jun’s face is a veritable storm.

“Ohno-kun, will you go get the cat bed?” he asks with unnerving politeness as he stalks off towards the kitchen.

“Is Sho-chan cooking?” Aiba asks excitedly, following right on Jun's heels. “Can I cook too? I can make mabo tofu! And if you don't have any tofu, I can make mabo anything!” he declares confindently as they disappear into the next room.

“Come on, Nino-chan. We have to find your cat bed,” Ohno says, placing the kitten gently on the floor before standing up. As he walks across the room, Nino twists dangerously in and out around his feet. Although with anyone else, this could lead to disaster (like the time Aiba accidentally stepped on Nino's tail, fell face-first into the wall and got a nosebleed), it's not a problem when it's them. Nino winds himself in circles through Ohno's legs. Ohno doesn't even trip.

Once in Jun’s bedroom, Ohno slides open the door to the nearest closet.

“Where do you think he'd keep a cat bed?” he asks Nino, peering curiously into the rows and rows of Jun's immaculately organized accessories.

Nino doesn't answer so Ohno turns around – and finds himself nose to nose with a boy.

“Oh,” says Ohno. “Hello.”

Nino rubs his cheek against Ohno’s. “Hi,” he says.

Ohno slips his arms around Nino’s waist and pulls them closer. Nino butts their foreheads together.

“Aiba-chan didn’t say you were coming,” Nino complains. “He made me ride all the way here on the train in that stupid bag and he didn’t say a word.”

“I told him not to. I wanted to surprise you,” explains Ohno.

“Hmph,” replies Nino, nosing at Ohno’s ear, his jaw, the corner of his mouth.

“C’mere,” says Ohno.

He reaches up to cup Nino’s face in his hands and kisses him softly. Nino whines a little, presses so close he has to slot their feet together, their legs together, from toe to hip.

“Surprise,” Ohno says as he pulls away.

There's a goofy grin on his face and Nino goes cross-eyed trying to see it. He leans back a little to get a better look, just as Ohno leans forward for another kiss. They lose their balance and this time when Nino's very human feet twist up in Ohno's, both of them trip, and soon they’re tumbling backwards into Jun’s open closet.

Nino lands on Ohno’s chest knocking the air out of him. A pile of neatly stacked hats come crashing down on their heads.

“That better not have been a crash of any kind coming from my bedroom," Jun shouts from the other side of the house where he is taking very little pleasure in supervising while Sho scrubs up the mess he's made of the kitchen floor.

"I bet they found the cat palace," says Aiba from behind the open refrigerator door, where he is scouting for mabo anything ingredients. "Oops!" he exclaims a second later as something shatters to the floor.

Jun takes a deep breath in and a deep breath out. Then one more for good measure. Tries at third just to be safe.

"This," he asserts sternly to no one in particular, "is why I can't have nice things."


	3. Part 3

Nino loses interest in the cat palace as soon as he realizes that Ohno can’t fit inside it with him, no matter how hard he tries to tug Ohno's foot through the door. He also seems unimpressed with the entire pile of shiny, never-been-used cat toys that Jun places out so hospitably for him.

That is until he finds the dinosaur.

The dinosaur is tiny and green and looks less like it was bought at a high-end pet boutique than that it was found by the side of the road. The felt of its body is starting to wear and pill, and one of its black plastic eyes is chipped. There’s even a tiny tear in the seam of its tummy where the stuffing is starting to come loose.

“Look, Matsujun! He found one he likes!” Aiba points out as Nino drags the tiny dino back into Ohno’s lap and starts to bite at it viciously.

Jun looks horrified. “I didn’t even pick that out. Shun brought it over. He found it outside by the side of the road.”

He reaches out and tries to take the dinosaur from Nino’s mouth, but the kitten refuses to let it go, digs his claws in with all four paws and glares up at Jun in warning.

Jun pulls his hand back, clears his throat with some discomposure. “Dessert anyone?” he asks, standing abruptly.

Nino holds on to his tiny dinosaur for the rest of the night.

*

When it’s time to go home, Nino won’t let go of his new toy.

“Matsujun, is it okay if we take Takeuchi Yuko home?” Aiba asks.

Jun looks up from where he’s still clearing away coffee cups. “Pardon?”

“The dinosaur,” Aiba explains. “That’s what her name is. You know - like the actress!”

“She's Nino’s favorite,” Ohno adds helpfully.

“He likes Takeuchi-san?” asks Sho with intrigued surprise.

Jun turns calmly back to his coffee cups. “Am I the only one here that is aware of the fact that cats don’t have favorite actresses?”

“But he loves her!” Aiba insists. “Whenever she’s on TV, he always sits right in front of it and watches. One time when I got home from work, he had one of her DVDs and – "

Nino gives an outraged meow from Ohno's arms, though it's mostly muffled by Takeuchi Yuko who he is carrying chivalrously in his mouth.

Jun, mercifully, does not allow Aiba to finish his story. “Fine, fine, take it," he says, looking several years older than he did when this dinner party began. "Just please go home already.”


End file.
